WHEN YOU WANT YOUR HUSBAND TO THINK YOU ARE SWEET SPIRITED, YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO BE SWEET SPIRITED

When Mark and I were first married, he had a bad temper.

He got mad a lot quicker than me.

I was the laid back one.

Years went by and Mark mellowed and I hardened.

I would just look at him and think, "Go ahead, make my day."
(I never saw that movie but I have heard that line)

One day I was doing dishes and listening to the radio.

A man was talking about his wife and he said she had such a sweet spirit, she spoke sweetly.

I stopped washing the dishes.

I wanted Mark to be able to say that about me.

In the past he would have, but somewhere along the way I got grouchy and not so sweet spirited.

I decided it was time to get back to myself.

It didn't take long to get my first test.

Mark calls me a lot during the day.

I was working on something and he called me, I saw it was him and I thought, "I just talked to you."

I was going to answer the phone one way, but then I remembered the man with the wife who had a sweet spirit, a wife who spoke sweetly.

So I answered sweetly.

I decided how I would respond.

I have been doing that every since.

Not perfectly but much, much better.

As women we have so much influence over our family, our attitudes and words matter.

Our husbands look to us for a reason to get up and go to work, they need our admiration and respect and the more we give it the more admirable and respectful they will become.

They need to hear how grateful we are for what they do instead of the list of what all they don't do.

Just a note to all you young wives out there, be patient, not always but a lot of times young men are quick to anger.

They feel a lot of pressure, they are trying to  find their way.

They often feel inadequate or unsure and sometimes that makes them grouchy.

Don't take it personal, they love you.

I'm not saying to put up with abuse but I am saying young men sometimes have a hard time finding their way and learning to be strong and yet gentle. To be a leader and yet not dominate.

At the same time they are trying to learn all of that,   we are trying to learn how to be the women we need to be.

There are going to be some rocky times.

The thing to remember is when God created you as a woman he gave you a lot of power.

You have a huge job when it comes to your family.

You really are the queen of your home, you have jurisdiction.

Decide now that when your husband or your children think about you they think of a sweet spirit.

Not  perfect, because some days you will get mad and not stop yourself,  one day you will snap back or maybe even snap first the thing is to get over it quickly and say you are sorry and move on.

You know how I always say the Bible was written for us and it helps me to sometimes take the scripture and make it personal?

For example the verse that says,  "a soft answer turns away wrath" Proverbs 15:1  I can change into, 'my soft answer will turn away wrath"  or turn down the heat of the argument..

With my words and my tone I can bring calm to an out of control disagreement.

Or this one is good too, "Pleasant words are health to the bones."  Proverbs 16:41
So when I want to say something to Mark I can make this verse personal, I can say to myself, "my pleasant words are healing to his broken spirit and tired bones."

James 1:19 says, "Be swift to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger."

So I'll recite out loud to myself, "I will be swift to listen, I will be slow to speak or talk back and I will be slow to get mad.

God's word has all the answers,

We can't just read the words we have to take them as personal instructions and put them into practice.

I don't mean a fake syrupy kind of sweetness.

I don't even mean you can never get mad, because the Bible doesn't say anger is sin, it says not to let our anger cause us to sin.

What I'm saying is be inspired, be amazed that you are honored to be the queen of your home and that you are blessed to be a blessing to your husband and your children.

Home is a wonderful place and we are the ones who get to make it that way .




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