Too Many Toys and To Many Meal Time Troubles

We've all heard the saying, "One thing leads to another."

Well, that must be true because one blog post or one story in a book, is leading to another one.

A new blog post about toys.

Now granted, I'm an old mom, I'm such an old mom that I'm a grandmom.

The good thing is, kids are pretty much made up in the very same way they were made up when I was a young mom.

The blood work or DNA of my kids would be the same of a kid today.

So what's changed?

We have changed?

We've changed.

Some of it is for the better and I think we need to embrace that.

Ezra will get my tablet and he knows how to slide his finger across it so he can see the pictures.

 That's great, I enjoy that.

He knows all about phones and that's okay too.

Like it or not it's where we live and they need to know those things.

They need to be comfortable with them.

So by all means get them some computerized, stuff at an early age.

It's important.

At the same time don't forget the quiet things.

Don't forget to get books.

Don't forget to read books without pictures, I did that often and early with our kids, then I would stop and ask them to describe to me what they saw.

Like when we read Little House on the Prairie I asked them to describe the horses or the wagons or whatever we were reading about.

We played games and we did puzzles.

I had the tv on and I had the tv off.

There wa a time when we didn't have a tv in our living room.

I'm not against tv but I didn't want it to be the focal point of our living room, it didn't want it to be the focal point of our life.

I still don't have a tv in the living room but I want one and as soon as I figure out where to put it I'm going to move one in there.

Now I have one in the kitchen which is probably worse than having one in the living room.

Anyway, back to the toys.

Don't buy to many toys.

Now, when I tell you what we did I'm not saying we did it right, because we did an awful lot wrong, I'm just answering questions.

We had a potato box, a wooden potato box that Mark had built and when the potatoes were gone I asked him to bring it up from the cellar.

I started using it for the kids toys, it was about the size of an average tote.


We had four kids and all of their toys together fit in that box.

They played with all kids of things and not so much with toys.

Sometimes we are the problem, when it comes to toys, we think they need this or they will love that and truth be told they will be excited for about five minutes on average and then they will move on.

Yes, there will be the exception but getting over toys quickly will be the norm so it's up to us not to fall into the oh they want this or need this or I want them to have that trap.

Set about keeping it simple.

Don't talk about keeping it simple, just keep it simple.

Don't think you have to take a trip down the toy aisle every time you go to the store.

When a toy comes in it's okay if a toy goes out, and you don't have to ask the kids about it, you don't have to ask them which one they want to give away.

There will come a time when you can do that but when they are young just don't even go there, you are fixing to upset both them and you, and for no reason.

You are the parent , you make the decision, they will never even notice.

In other words, our kids will follow our lead.

It's the same way with food...people ask about getting their kids to eat.

Just eat.

Sit down and have supper, fix a meal, don't ask them if they like it, don't give them choices, just feed them.

I know that sounds crazy, I don't mean never give them choices but they don't need a lot of choices to early, they can't handle it.

Sometimes it would never even occur to the child to ask for something else but we're to quick to say, "Do you want something else?"

When I said kids had not changed it's true they haven't, we have.

Do you think a child in the 1930s got to say, I want something else?

Do you think their mother would have done that?

No, they learned to eat and  and not complain and because of that, their palate was developed.

Sometimes the easier life gets the more complicated it gets.

We say we don't but we have more money and more time and more ability to waste than any other generation before us and it isn't for the good.

Don't complicate meal time, fix supper, serve supper, don't talk a lot about it, just eat.
If you have already got one that is complaining it's going to be difficult but you can do it.

Take control.

Keep choices simple, don't  be to quick to offer an alternative.

So long story short because really it's pretty simple, just keep it simple, don't over do it on toys and don't over do it at dinner.

Just live and live simply.

I know there are some awful stories about Amish and Mennonite abuse, just like there are stories about people like us abusing our children.

I'm not talking about that right now I want to talk about normal loving Amish and Mennonite parents, mothers in particular.

I've never been in a store
and seen an out of control Amish mother or out of control children.

I've never had them in my home and known them to be disobedient.

I've never been to their home and seen them be that way.

Does it happen, sure it does, but it's not the norm, it's not the norm because they are still parenting the way people parented for years.

They aren't being driven by every new thought or idea about child rearing, they stick with the tried and the true.

The keep it simple.

There is no big program,  there is just common sense and time.

Kids take a lot of that.


Comments

  1. John Rosemond is one of my favorite experts & authors on raising children. Most of his work is based on the way parenting has changed over the past 50 years. Until then, young parents looked to their parents & grandparents for wisdom. Then in the mid-20th Century, a bunch of child psychologists/social engineers began touting theories about how to raise children, & everything since has gone downhill. Now young parents seek advice from so-called "experts", even though most of their theories have never been proved---i.e. they didn't produce the results promised.

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