INVITE GRACE TO CHRISTMAS DINNER

Mark's family isn't like my family.

You are shocked aren't you?

No, I know you aren't because your family isn't like your spouses family either.

We tend to think they are going to be, and we tend to think they are supposed to be and that often causes trouble on the holidays.

When I was first married, well really even before we got married I was shocked at how Mark's family did Christmas.

I felt like I should stand up and say, "Excuse me, I hate to say anything but you are going about this all wrong."

That embarrasses me so bad to say that.
Can you even imagine?

Of all the nerve.

My mom and dad always bought gifts like crazy when I was young.

At Marks folks they drew names and Lowell and June even drew in with them.

I was shocked.

I thought everyone was to get for everyone and the parents were especially supposed to get for everyone.

I mean for their children anyway, even if they are grown.

At my folks Christmas dinner was huge, food everywhere.

There were huge pans of everything and everyone brought containers to take food home with them.

At the Grays, there was a wonderful meal.

A well thought out menu and enough was made for everyone to have a good meal.

There weren't gobs of leftovers for everyone to divide up and take home.

That was different.

I wondered if I should tell them, I mean they would  want to know they needed to do things differently.

There I went again.

Of all the nerve.

Their Christmas was just fine it was just different than my families.

Over the years, our Christmas celebration with our children has became a combination of both of our families but we tend more toward the Gray way now.

The Marshall Christmas's have even became more like the Gray Christmas's now.

We don't have much of a gift exchange anymore and everyone is good with it.

We all like to think that our families will be perfect Norman Rockwell pictures at Christmas.

Well.... for the most part they aren't.

There can be problems in blood family as well as with in-laws.

Tensions can be strong, you feel nervous and anxious even thinking about being with that certain person.

If  you have any age on you at all you have probably had at least one  Christmas when you were uncomfortable with a family member and they with you.

Now if it's common for you to have that problem you might want to check yourself because you could be a big part of the problem, but most have it at least a time of two.

First off just accept what you can't change.

Don't act or feel shocked when your dad says that thing you knew he would say or your mother in law does that thing that makes you crazy.

You already know it's going to happen so just go ahead and deal with it in your heart before you get there.

Don't focus on what's wrong with them but think about what's not so great about you.

What I mean is we need to offer grace because we need grace.

I doubt there is a  single perfect person reading this.

That means for every thing we could tell on them, they could come right back at us and if we think that isn't true we probably are a big part of the problem.

Don't play over the bad in your mind, instead think on the good.

Say out loud each day before Christmas three good things about the person you are dreading to see.

Pray for them.

Pray for yourself.

You see you don't have to be best friends with that person but you need to be able to get along until the evenings over.

Focus on making that person feel comfortable.

Forget about yourself, it's not about you anyway.

Now I know some are facing big issues but I'm talking about just little things that we can let become big things.

I'm talking about when our family members or in laws aren't bad, mean people they are just irritating and we let ourselves get worked up.

Don't wear your heart on your sleeve.

Don't think people mean something by everything or you will never have a minutes peace.

Most people never intend to be offensive or to hurt your feelings.

Truth be told they probably don't even know they did they hurt our feelings.

Truth also be told, we have hurt others and were unaware.

Christmas dinners take a lot of grace so start packing it now so you can take a lot of it with you and you want to remember the most important thing.

Somewhere somebody is packing grace for you.

You might not know it, you might think you don't need it but we  all need it.

So don't go to that dinner without it.

And be glad others are bringing it with them as well.

Here's to a grace filled Merry Christmas!!


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